The holiday season, with all its many festivities, abundant food and family gatherings, tends to bring out the best in us. We become more loving, giving and even forgiving. In that spirit, we decided to discuss spiritual fitness as we develop our next tab “Spiritual Health.”

A 2004 study by Association of Religion Data Archives revealed that many Americans are interested in becoming more spiritually connected to God. In fact, 33.8 percent of the 1,100 surveyed said this thought occupied their minds daily. Eleven percent, however, said they had no desire at all to be close to God.

We need look no further than the news headlines for multiple examples of failure among spiritual leaders. Whether it is a bad judgment call or a fall from grace, the flock is always disappointed when it finds out a religious leader has feet of clay.

Broken trust is hard to heal, says Bishop Noel Jones, a renowned theologian and senior pastor of the City of Refuge Church in Gardena, Calif. Focusing on God while forgiving men and women for their human frailties is part of the process toward healing and learning to trust again, he said. A trusted leader with more than 20 years as a seasoned counselor, Bishop Jones shared his insights on recovering from spiritual wounds with The Healing Continuum.

THC: How do people recover when they are hurt by those in the church?

Bishop Jones: Getting over hurts by anything and anyone is difficult and excruciating, especially when your experience and your expectation don’t collide. We expect our spiritual leaders to provide consolation, tranquility and strength; those are high expectations. We as clergy market the church and Jesus Christ in such a manner that an individual is promised a lot. Nowadays, you walk into a church with wicked and psychotic people in the pulpit, who are also gifted. But at the end of the day you can easily be left broken. Your expectation becomes trust, and when that trust is destroyed, it is not easy to regain. You must forgive yourself for trusting the individual(s). To properly heal, you should understand that no one is perfect and that it is healthy to trust. Having a personal relationship with God helps to put the situation in its proper perspective. In doing so, you will get your strength to heal from the messenger’s God not the messenger. Mankind is not the answer.

THC: How do I know what church is right for me?

Bishop Jones: Do you want a church that is philosophical or politically charged? Do you want a church that helps you handle the workplace? Do you want a church that helps you cope as a single parent? Or do you want a church that helps you deal with negative thoughts? However you choose, your decision should be made according to the message.

THC: What advice do you have for those who choose not to go to church but rather serve God in their own personal way?

Bishop Jones: Throughout history, the church has always been a place where tradition and wisdom can be passed down. We all need a mentor who can teach us about things we have no experience or knowledge of, like the Bible and spiritual issues. In the case of worshipping by yourself, you are in danger of misleading yourself.

Bishop Noel Jones is senior pastor of the City of Refuge Church in Gardena, Calif. His TV ministry “Fresh Oil” is featured on BET and the Church networks. To find out more about Bishop Jones and his ministry log on to www.noeljonesministries.org.